Tuesday, October 30, 2007

I look around in haste.....

One of those days when you wake up... more than at peace with the world.
Not just with a smile on your face... but with an almost tangible joy in your guts...
You reconfirm if you are not in a dream... and snuggle back into the blankets for 10 more minutes of precious sleep...
But the almost conscious presence of the emotion...is too amusing to let you drift away.

Even the missed bus... the gymnastics to avoid the mud-puddles formed from last night's rain..
the balancing act of dripping umbrella in one hand and the frantic search for change for the ticket... unsuccessful attempt at finding a seat... doing a little jig to the tune of the bumpy ride...

fails to take away... the glint in my eye and the spring in my step...
as I walk to work... when the weather is just right
Folded hands and eyes closed I take note of the just-got-it-right chillness of the breeze.

I look around in haste....
to check if anyone noticed my impromptu giggle.... and the sway to a tune in my mind.

Sunday, October 28, 2007


We knew it all along. It always hung in mid-air all around us, all along.
In frenzied television debates. In passionate drawing room discussions.
The news papers reeked of it. Social activists shouted on top of their voices..on streets... on television..everywhere.
In hush whispers and muted voices in lanes where life must have been normal once.. but not since...

In dejection... in disbelief... in disgust.

Its just that.. its now on camera. Direct and in your face.

All those denials that stemmed from disbelief that such a thing could happen....tossed out of the window. All those half-baked self assurances gained from brushing it off as a action-reaction... staring in your face. All illusions of... 'not entirely preventable' theories.... where are you now?


Let me also.. address few things that will be hurled at me.. for this.

-Elections are around the corner in Gujrath.
-Congress will take political mileage out of this.
-The magazine and the news channel will sensationalize it.

me:So what?

-Why rake up old wounds?
-Haven't people started recovering? Why instigate communal tensions again?
-Its all sensationalistic crap.
-How relevant is it, today? One has to move on.
-Isn't there a judiciary around..to do the duty? Who are these self-professed torch bearers of justice anyways?
-Political equations have changed... between Modi and his once upon a time followers.. May be there is more to it.. than what catches the eye.

me:All these are irrelevant.

The point is...the same guy still holds the office.
The cases against most of them... are still open.And what judiciary are you talking about. Its a complete system collapse.
How can one move with the very system in place and fully functional.The very same system.. where all you have to say is 'Jai Shri Ram' and the police would let you free on innocents... with a bomb in your hand.
Where the scattered corpses remind them of battle scenes from some holy war.The system where.. as if in some cheap political thriller novel.. the supremo says 'do whatever you want.. you have three days'.
And those very people are hidden.. cases hushed up.. Witnesses threatened...

And.....they brag about it....
It like those lines we read in books where there is a talk about looking in to the face of evil..unmasked and unashamed.
You hear them talk about chopping off an ex-MP... He could as well have been talking about his favourite movie.
You see a man's animated replay of how he slit open a womans womb and threw the foetus in the air.. with almost a relish... a glee worthy of a blood-licking lip-smacking monster.

And one is filled up with disgust. At oneself for being co-labeled 'human' alongside them.

One is forced to think.. that maybe millenia of socialization have really done nothing.. but maybe just camouflage a little more carefully and we still really are ...animals.

Well... you think I am being reactive.. and super sensationalist..?
Sorry boss!!! There is just too much disgust and anger in me right now and if you choose to give it a 'tag'... go ahead!

And yeah!!!.. I write this days after I know of the story. Days after I had the rush to write this.
Coz.. I am not really a believer of acting on immediate emotion.
If you would feel 'less' about it, the next morning..then its not worth acting on it tonight.
80 lives. And we won't pay his medical bills.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

After ...

reading average and hearing good/great reviews about it..finally managed to watch the movie today.
Happy Days.

It has become..kinda 'toast of the season' here...

Having watched it now... I can see clearly...the reason for disparity in the reviews I talked about.
First things first.. this is a product..that knows who it is targeting. And shouts about it from the roof-top.

A critic who gets the free ticket to watch and sit in judgment of this movie... will not find many adjectives to add...
I think..he will not even manage to differentiate it from the scores of movies that come up bearing the 'college' tag.
But thats exactly the point!!!! I am not gonna talk about the craft of film making here..
Trust me..its completley irrelevant here...

The actual customer doesn't see it as a film.. and if you are not the intended customer... then the joke is on you my friend.. your opinion doesnt matter!! This movie isnt asking for one.
This is one product that cannot stand alone. It leans too heavily on its audience.
This movie does absolutely nothing for you..if you don't have a memory bank to go back to.
Every penny this movie makes finds its root in the connect that a member of the audience has managed to establish with a scene. Its evident from the reaction of the crowds...
The 'oh! thats exactly what happened with us na' 'Hey wasnt that how that fellow reacted then' 'Thats a scene to scene..dialogue to dialogue..copy of our life yaar's are why the movie is a hit.

The movie works solely for one reason... its personal for everybody in the audience.
Shekhar brought it too close to home.. The Hyderabad engineering students!!!!!
No wonder people are going berserk over it.

Hmm.. could it have been better.. ? sure!!! Both cinematically and in the context I am talking about.
But the things is... the ride is good enough! So.. what the hell!!!!

Saturday, October 20, 2007

I laugh a lot....

Desensitization has become a fact of life... It always was and will continue to be. Or we wouldn't survive. Maybe..coz I could think of no other explaination.
Its a classic drawing room line, actually.
Whats there in the news....the same crap every morning!!!!
... another murder here... few killed there.. mob-violence somewhere else.. corruption everywhere, primitive ways of enforcing self-professed ideas of justice... blatant disregard for others rights... moral and cultural policing...

I guess one doesn't really reflect or realise .. the kind or extent of desensitization that has taken place. Not unless..it hits home. Hardly a kilometer away... and you watch it in the bulletin just like any other. The names and numbers scrolling down on the screen give you the chills, coz you know it could have been you or your dear ones. And here comes the worst part. You are used to it. You hear it daily...don't you? Nothing new... it was some other city yesterday.. today its yours and tomorrow it'll be somebody else's...
That's when the disgusting realisation dawns....

We have become OK about it.. we accept it as a part of our lives. We talk furiously about it that evening... and the next morning... we are back to normal.
All kinds of crap happens in this country.... but yeh sab tho..'hota hai yaar'..right!!!?

The same rehearsed lines spoken each time.... 'we strongly condemn this act' 'whoever is responsible for this... will be punished' 'we will make sure justice is delivered' 'I request people to maintain calm' ' We announce an ex-Gratia of 2 lacks each to every deceased one's family' 'A job for each bread-earner lost' 'An enquiry ordered..report ready within 2 weeks'....

And before you know it... its time for the same speech again..
Just a different place... different excuse for the act.

Do I have a solution? No. And here I am not setting out to find one.

This particular post operates on a much narrower context.
It just that.. it doesn't feel right!
I think that...
human life...even a single one.. surely deserves more respect than what it gets today.

(Oh yeah..by the way..I know all the phrases... so don't bother.
It happens everywhere..all the time... part of life...what can one do... there is only so much one can do... forces beyond our control... the world doesn't operate on logic..it doesn't recognise words like 'fair' 'justice' 'reason'...!!!!)

I laugh a lot...
and smile a lot less...I guess.
(completely unrelated to the post, though!! Just a whim!)

Thursday, October 04, 2007